with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
