I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
