I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Randomize