He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
