just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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