There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
