the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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