did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
