They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
this boner is exhausting
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
