i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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