Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
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