He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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