I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
