once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So I just went to clothing optional bar
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
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