Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize