The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
