I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
