spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
