Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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