the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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