i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
