Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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