Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
