i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
