I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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