Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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