I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
did you just send me my own nude
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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