i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
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