I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
