Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
