we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
They are going to name an STD after you.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
