I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
