Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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