he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
