is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
