Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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