I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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