If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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