Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
People in love make me want to vomit
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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