I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
How external is "for external use only"?
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
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