i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
