You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
