Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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