i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
