no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
We left an ass print on the piano.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
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