While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
