i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
