My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
