She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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