Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
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