I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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