Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
false alarm. still invincible.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
