Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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