Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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